That’s how I’m known, ya know… Samara’s Mom.
And that’s okay.
And I don’t mind calling other parents to introduce myself, however I prefer when it’s to invite her friends over to play or to get the spelling lists that we’ve forgotten at school… again…
and not for the reason that I had to call today.
When Samara walked in the door tonight she said, “I just can’t take it any more.”
My immediate thought?
What now, oh Queen of Drama?
What came out of her mouth next floored me.
“There’s this boy on the bus (we’ll call him Jim) and he keeps telling (we’ll call her best friend Rae) that he wants to… you know… with me.”
“You know what, Samara?” Praying that it was anything but what I already knew it was.
“I can’t say the word” she said.
“Say it,” I said followed by “I won’t yell at you.”
“sssssss………….”
“What Samara?”
“Sex. He tells Rae that he wants to me to come to his house so that we can have sex.”
WWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAATTTTTTTTTTTT?
I looked at her and said, “Samara, I’m going to the school with so you better be telling me the truth.”
She looked at me and said, “Today he told me he wanted to hump me.”
“Are you telling me the truth?” I ask again. The last thing I want to make is false accusations against a FIRST GRADER…..
Matthew piped up and said, “She’s telling the truth mom, I heard him.”
I looked at her and told her that I would take care of it. Inside I was ready to scream.
How do FIRST GRADERS know about sex? And WHY is he talking to my baby and her friend about it… not only about it, but an act that he wants THEM involved in?
So tonight, I called Rae’s mom. After I calmed down. Because I am going to the school and because her daughter is also involved, I didn’t want her to be blindsided.
She thanked me of course and told me that Rae hadn’t said anything to her about it.
And to keep her in the loop.
And I will.
But even as I sit here and type this out, I’m still in shock about this.
I’m not the most protective parent, but I do monitor what my children hear and see. And, I’m sorry, but I don’t care how old you are, you shouldn’t be talked to in that manner. I’d probably slap the man that looked at me and said that. Or said it to my best friend about me.
So here’s where I’m stuck. Into how much detail do I go with my 8 year old? Do I take this up with the school and not go into specifics about what this is that he’s talking about (praying that she doesn’t already know)? Or do I sit her down and talk to her about it?
Seriously, I don’t know how much more I can take this week. (More on Matthew later…)
Until next time…
Heather
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When my daughter was in grade school. I think it was 2nd grade. This boy told her she could get pregnant if she sat on his lap and kissed him. So of course she comes home to ‘verify’ if this was the truth or not. DA HELLZ??????????? Is right.
I had to have the ‘talk’ with My sweet innocent baby girl. It killed me. KILLED me. And we had a very lovely conversation at the school the next day too.
Good Luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Keep us posted.
Oh my gosh! All I can think of is this is why Duck doesn’t ever want Doodle riding the bus! I’m prayin’ for ya girl! I don’t have any advice at all. The devil’s coming at you from all sides — we need to step up praying for you!
Seriously? This really reminds you that the world is such an ugly place sometimes. I’m so sorry that you and your children had to go through this at such an early age.
I remember when my son came home from his 2nd grade class and told me that his classmate told him he wanted to F- another girl in the class. I was shocked. I asked my son if he knew what the boy meant and he sheepishly said he did. I had “the talk” with my son just to be sure. He didn’t have a clue. He just thought he knew.
My husband was convinced this kid heard his dad or older brother making that statement and didn’t know what he was talking about, but you never know these days.
oh my – i had to have this conversation when they were young too 1st and 2nd grade.
i think it was better for them to hear about it from me so that they got the truth and it set an example that i would be there to talk to them in the future as they get older. truthfully though, all i wanted to do was hide under the table.
if you decide to talk to her. 1)let her lead the conversation, ask her if she has any questions about what that boy said, she already knows that ‘sex’ is not something to talk about. 2) keep it as simple as possible 3) let this or any other time you have the conversation be an opportunity to let you mold their little minds and to pass on the values and idea that are important to you.
oh yeah and try really hard not to smack that kid when you see him. one boy called my daughter the “B” word right in front of me and oh man did i almost lose it!!!
i am so sorry – GOOD LUCK
i wanted to add one more thing. as much as we want our kids to be pure, it’s our responsibility to inform them. it’s so hard and it’s a dang on shame we have to have these talks with them at this early age. makes you wanna TASE somebody!!!!!!!! uurgh!!!!!!!!
I have a hard time talking about sex w/ my kids, so I’d wait for questions personally. Both of mine know what it is though. My oldest is almost 10, so her friends told my 6 year old what it is & even proceeded to show her by “humping a pole” in my sweet little 6 year olds word. She was 5 at the time. I also get to hear all about who has crushes & who likes who, etc. Has been going on since both mine were in Kindergarten. Kids know a lot these days. We had a 5th grade parent meeting yesterday & one of the moms was concerned about the upcoming talks with the kids. She was worried for her son, I had to laugh because the kids now know so much more then they learn at the school talks, lol. Oh & I would probably mention it to the school. No girl deserves to be spoken too like that especially at the young age. That boy could be headed for trouble & his parents may not even realize it. Good luck & sorry you are going through this!
Ouch what a touchy subject! And I can’t believe how much young kids these days know. When I was in 1st grade I knew nothing about sex!
Glad that I’m not the one in your shoes!
I can’t even imagine having to have that talk this young. When I learned “the facts” I was 11 (going into sixth grade at the middle school) and my mom told me because she figured there would be talk about it at school. I was so clueless! And yet I wonder if my daughter will still be clueless at that age!
Good luck – I’ll be praying for you.
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