Taking a Mountain Back Down to a Molehill…

When I get nervous I talk.

Alot.

So it should surprise no one that I blog alot as well when I’m nervous, or anxious, or stressed or any combination thereof.

At 2am, who’s around to listen to me?

Everyone which is truly what I love about blogging, I can be heard. By all 10 of you who will most likely not read this until tomorrow morning, or afternoon… or never.

Your comments about stepping outside my comfort zone and suggestions on how not to be quite the wallflower meant so much. They made my evening especially the one from…

Well, we’ll leave it at that. They made my night.

I KNOW that I’m making a mountain of a mole hill. Seriously, I know this. My life is filled with mountains. Some are true mountains, put there by others. And then there are those that I create myself.

Tonight, amidst my packing and cleaning and driving to and from the Lake (like I had TIME to go to dinner at the Lake tonight…) I spent some time talking with the Big Man.

(Do you ever wish that God was REALLY with you… as in we could chat while He washed and I dried the dishes? Just curious.)

And I was reminded of Matthew 21:21 as I frantically tried to find the clothes that would work, layers (of which I know nothing about) and tried to decide what clothes would work for what.

Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but also you can say to this mountain, ‘Go, throw yourself into the sea,’ and it will be done.

My faith can move these mountains. It says it right there. If I have faith and do not doubt, I can move that mountain whether its one I created or not.

I choose which mountains stay and which mountains go. I do.

For someone who loves to have control, here’s one place where I’m just not cool with it. I have to take responsibility for my mountains.

But it goes to show you that when I actually stop and pay attention the answers appear.

One day, I’ll fully grasp this concept. It is the true definition of insanity — doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. I keep thinking I’ve got it under control and that’s when God steps in and chuckles and asks, “Oh Heather…. when are you going to learn?”

I put my tail between my legs and come running back to finally do it the right way.

So here’s the deal.

I’ve cleaned up. Its not museum quality but it’s done. I’m almost packed. I need some more shoes. I have my BlogHer folder filled with reading material for the plane and every piece of info that I need.

And while I was making my list, I got an email from someone who will also be staying at the Hostel. I now have someone that I can attach myself like a leech to walk back and forth from the hostel with when Sally drops me off Friday morning and I spend the night in the City.

Lots to do tomorrow before I head to Lisa’s. (And she better be in new clothes at least when she takes me to the airport… although, she’ll probably look more spiffy than me…)

I still have some Mississippi stories to tell and I promise, we’ll get to them when I get back from BlogHer. I wanted to autopost them, but I didn’t get them written. And I don’t care. No one’s going to die because they didn’t hear about our dinner at Cock of the Walk. But when I get back, I’ll be trying to intertwine Mississippi stories with BlogHer stories and stories that are happening now. It should be interesting.

But when is my life anything but?

Until next time…