Comments on: This whole parenting thing?

By: Ann G

Ann G — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 23:46:29 +0000

Beats me!! I have an 18 year old and a 4 year old….and I still have no idea which decisions to make for either of them! lol I let my 18 year old make NEARLY every decision for himself, now, but if it involves money, which I control or pay, I lean HEAVY on mommy made decision. My 4 year old…now he’s another story…He gets to choose his clothes, his toys, his meals and his sport/extra-curriculiar activites (hockey and karate) but everything else I decide! I figure that’s enough for a 4 year old!

Ann Gs last blog post..Random Stuff

By: Cathy | Mommy Motivation

Cathy | Mommy Motivation — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 19:56:30 +0000

Awesome question. I hope more readers chime in. I’ve lots of food for thought from the comments on this one. I wonder how many of us think that we have a child that is particularly immature for their age? Could it be true if so many of us question the same thing?

Good thoughts, Heather. Prayers for Matt. That was a very grown up decision to make. I think I would have run away from a “procedure” and then regretted it later.

Good job, Mommy!

By: Willow

Willow — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 15:55:01 +0000

I let my kids weigh in on big decisions like medical stuff but, for anything important like that, I am the final authority. I’ll acknowledge their feelings or opinions and then explain to them why I think we need to do it the way I’ve decided. For less important things, I let them make the decisions — like spending their allowances, for example. My youngest is a trusting soul and would never think of cheating anybody but he has been cheated twice on eBay deals. I feel like I need to let him learn some of those lessons the hard way.

By: Kitkat4real SOLO dot MOM

Kitkat4real SOLO dot MOM — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 14:34:09 +0000

I too have been struggling with this now that Jas is 13. But I like allowing him to make some decisions for himself… it will show me areas I need to continue to work on over the next few years while I have a chance, I think. Like the quarters blog I shared a while back. I want him to be able to stand on his own feet and make decisions he can feel good about because he wants to – not because i step in and make him.

JMHO.
kat

Kitkat4real SOLO dot MOMs last blog post..Single Parents, We Will Survive

By: Annabelle@Christian Momma

Annabelle@Christian Momma — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 13:52:11 +0000

Right now, my oldest just turned 11. I let him make some decisions, but not many. He is pretty immature compared to others his age. Finding the right balance is hard. Annabelle@Christian Mommas last blog post..Camping

By: Grace

Grace — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 13:51:00 +0000

Oh man! What a tough question for me to answer. Mine is 16, she’s got some serious book smarts, but not alot of street smarts. This is a problem.

Hubby and I are trying (TRYING) to let some stuff go and let her grow up…making decisions for herself. Somedays, I think this is a big mistake. HOWEVER, it’s our fault for not letting her make some decisions on her own WAY earlier.

I applaud you. Trust me, you do NOT want to be in my spot. She’ll be graduating this year, so college…think of the decisions that come along with that.

Someone please put me out of my misery!

Keep up the good work! I found you from allmediocre.com, and I have enjoyed reading…I’ll come back!

Graces last blog post..Updated About Me

By: Melissa

Melissa — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 13:42:33 +0000

Well, she’s six (almost seven) so I’m in the midst of trying to decide what decisions I let her make. Right now, it’s limited to what to have for breakfast, or what to wear to school – with some guidance on both fronts, of course. I’ve just realized that Anna Marie asks my permission for EVERYTHING – last night at a special event, she asked if she could have two mints! I don’t think I micromanage her life that badly, but I’m trying to help her find a balance in what she needs to ask permission for and what she doesn’t.

Hope Matthew’s ear gets better!

Melissas last blog post..I feel like I’ve been hit by a Mac truck

By: Andrea

Andrea — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 04:50:40 +0000

Hey Heather! I find as a single mother I tend to want to make a lot of “guilt” decisions…I think that stepping back every once in a while is good, because it teaches your kids that they need to think and have confidence in and for themselves…and learn what the “right” thing to do is. As long as we are in the background with more knowledge and common sense, they’ll figure it out right. Now if the decision was whether to pierce or not to pierce…;)

Andreas last blog post..Comforts of Home…

By: jenn

jenn — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 03:15:37 +0000

Oh boy – letting them make their own decisions can be tough, especially since I like to think I am always right! But my oldest are 14 and soon to be 13 – I have to let them make decisions on their own. It’s now or never…

I’ve worked with them on looking at the bigger picture. We implement a 5-5-5-5 discussion. How will this decision affect me in 5 minutes? 5 days? 5 months? 5 years? I let them answer first, then I chime in if I see something they may have missed and as long as I don’t think it will cause serious long term harm to, then the decision is theirs to make. It is still really tough but we are all learning together.

I think you did a great job with Matthew today. I think he made a good decision because he was able to know what his priorities were and choose the one that fit best! So Matt did a great job today too :O)

By: Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart

Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Heart — Thu, 18 Sep 2008 02:05:29 +0000

Well, since my oldest is just almost four, decisions around here are quite simple. Juice or milk? Dress or shorts? Those kind of decisions. I admire you mamas with older ones. I know it must be a tough job. I can only pray that I will have lots of wisdom as my kiddos grow. Lizz @ Yes, and So is My Hearts last blog post..The Money Guy