How the Boy Attempts To Make Me Think I’m Losing My Mind

I will be the first to admit that sometimes, I’m a few fries short of a happy meal; that my elevator doesn’t go all the way to the top floor; that I have a few screws loose.

It’s true.  My brain goes faster than I can talk, write, act… basically move.  It’s always four steps ahead of my body.

I’ve learned to deal with it and if I want to calm it down and rope it in… well, that’s what they make Adderal for.

I will also be the first to admit that I am not the best housekeeper and while I’m LEAPS and BOUNDS better than, say, one year, one month, and 5 days ago, I’m still not channeling the neat freak in any way, shape or form.

And while we’re talking neat freak here…the boy isn’t one either, however, there are certain ways that he likes certain things.  I can’t call him a neat freak because if her WERE a TRUE neat freak, the two laundry baskets sitting upstairs in his room for longer than a week now would already have been put away.  But like I said, there are certain things that he likes certain ways and clean counter tops is one of those things.

I can’t disagree with him on that.  His kitchen is very small and there is not a lot of counter top room, so if things get piled up, then it looks like a mess and so he is very good about putting things away when they are left laying around.

What I can’t get him to understand is that I am NOT letting things lie around.  Ok, well sometimes, maybe I do… but I try very hard not to.

I have come to the conclusion that if I am doing anything in the kitchen, I must hold on to, and not sit anything down on the counter in hopes to return to that place in a few moments and expect it to be there.

He’s like a vulture.

For example, last night, I went to heat up some of the leftover cheeseburger rice.  I removed the food from the fridge, got a bowl to put it in, a spoon to scoop it from the tupperware container and into the bowl.  I sat the spoon down.  I returned the food to the fridge and then went to put my bowl into the microwave.

After one minute and thirty seconds, I removed the bowl from the microwave, and returned to the spot on the counter where I thought I left my spoon so that I could consume the food that I just heated up.

It was gone.

I looked around, thinking maybe I put it somewhere else.  It’s possible.  I’m forever putting things down and not remembering where I placed them.  (Like the shoes that I wore yesterday?  Can’t find them anywhere!)  Immediately, I placed the blame on me, that I was scatterbrained and couldn’t remember things.

I looked next to the microwave because that would be logical but there was no trace of a spoon.

It was then that I looked closer and realized that my spoon?

Was in with the dirty dishes.

In the time that it took for me to heat the food up, one minute and thirty seconds, and my back turned for no more than that time, he swooped in and picked up my spoon.

It wouldn’t have been so bad, except shortly before that I had returned to the kitchen to get a drink and my cup, that still had liquid in it, was gone.  Into the dishwasher it went after the juice was discarded.

He does it all the time.

Don’t get me wrong.  I’m glad that he’s not a slob and leaves things everywhere in the common areas of the house.  However, I do try to conserve the amount of glasses and silverware that we use every day, in that, one cup, per person, per day should be enough.

I finally, after going on and on about this last night, told him that I was going to get a cup and label it with my name and that I would be responsible for the cleaning of it and that no one was to touch it.

He agreed that to save our relationship, that would probably be the best idea.

But seriously?

Sometimes when he does this…I truly think that I’m going crazy.

Personally, I think he thinks it’s funny to watch me stand there in the kitchen scratching my head with the befuddled look on my face trying to figure out where my cup or spoon is… but he’d never admit it.

And since I’ve now publically posted this and had a long, drawn out conversation last night, in which I was highly animated, I’m pretty sure now?

He’ll do it on purpose… because he LOVES to get a rise out of me.

But it’s one of the reasons that I love being around him… he keeps things interesting and 9 times out of 10, he makes me laugh.

Even if it is at my expense and my sanity…

Until next time…