Who Needs GPS?

Hi, my name is Heather and I’m navigationally challenged.

It’s true. I won’t try to hide it or attempt to appear as if I know where I’m going…even if it’s in my own town.

I dread going places I’ve never been before or places that I can’t visualize the directions. I know, before I even get in the car, that I’m going to get lost or turned around.

I know that I need to give myself more time (doesn’t mean I do) to get places.

And the most common reaponse when I tell people about my lack of direction is, “you need GPS.”.

Dear friends….

I have GPS. I have Sprint Navigation on my phone. Additionally, I have two other map programs, including google maps.

I still get lost.

And I can’t tell you how many times I’ve called the boy, near tears, explaining to him that I can’t figure out how to get from point a to point b.

Know what he does? He tells me exactly how to get there…in real time even. I’m always amazed.

This has happened on three occassions in the past month (that I can recall).

The first time my GPS kept telling me to make a left onto 1st Street. Didn’t matter where I went, it brought me back to where I needed to make a left onto 1st street. I was on my way to meet with a customer. I was already a ball of nerves.
I called the boy and when he answered, I wailed… “I don’t know how to get to client x…it keeps telling me to make a left on 1st street but I can’t! Its the pedestrian bridge!!!”

“Calm down,” he says. (He’s so patient with me.) “Where are you going?”

After he told me I should drive over the pedestrian bridge just for fun, he got me to the road I needed to be on and would say things like “you’re going to go down a hill and then on your right will be this…” Or “at the top of the hill look left and you’ll see…”

And it happens at the same time that I’m seeing it. Amazes me every.single.time.

Last night, the GPS was trying to route me home on the back country roads instead of the interstate. It brought me in that way, but it was day light. But at night? In the dark? An hour in the car by myself?

I wanted the interstate like I want my mother when I’m sick.

So I called the boy. “I can’t find my way to the interstate.”

“What do you see?” He asked. (I know he was chuckling to himeself…) I’ve learned how to answer.

“Backstreet pizza is across the street on the left.”

And darned if he didn’t get me from there to the interstate (in real time) from me just telling him what I saw.

Personally, I don’t know why I bother with the stupid maps.

I think I’ll just ring him everytime I need to go somewhere.

He’s got a much better personality than the GPS lady and….

A much sexier voice.

Until next time…