Never Thought the First Day of School Would Be Like This!

I am one big, hot mess.

It’s horrible.  I keep sitting here telling myself that this is silly and that I should be completely okay today.  But I’m not.

Today is one of those days that will go down in parenting infamy.

As in, I’ve NEVER been this way on the first day of school.  Typically, I’m the mother the emulates the old Staples commercial where the dad is going down the aisles singing “it’s the most wonderful time of the year.”

And yes, I’ve been the mother that has been super excited to get her morning time back and to cease all daycare payments.

Until 8am this morning.

Maybe it’s because all four of them were starting new schools.

Maybe it’s because we had two milestones in that thing 4 started kindergarden this year and thing 2 started middle school.

Maybe it’s because I knew that thing 1 and 2 both missed their orientations.

Or maybe it’s a combination of all of the above.

Regardless, we put things 3 and 4 on the bus and then I drove the older two to the middle school.  My plan was to at least have 20 minutes to walk around the school with Thing 2 and find her classes and work with her locker.

And we had that time.

She was slightly frustrated with the locker.  I kept telling her that she would not be the only child that had trouble with her locker (shoot!  even i had trouble with it, showing her.)

But then?

It was time to deposit her in the auditorium with all the other 6th graders and when she walked in, I know that she was looking for a familiar face.  My heart sank.  I knew she wasn’t going to find one.  All the memories I’ve contained as a child of a first day in a new school came flooding back and I knew just how she felt.

But she turned and looked at me and said, “I’ll call you after school.”

I left.

But I wasn’t ready to leave that school.  So I marched up the stairs, found her locker and I prayed hard over her locker.  I prayed that satan be bound from that school.  I prayed for peace.  I prayed that it would open the first time every single time she came to unlock it.  I prayed for the students that owned the lockers next to hers — that they would be kind and caring.. and friendly.

This came after I woke up 20 minutes before anyone else this morning and sat on the desk as the sun was rising and prayed my little heart out for all four of them on their big day.

I have been a bundle of nerves all day.

Perhaps I should’ve prayed for me and the hubs.

I wonder if Thing 4 has had a meltdown yet because things weren’t perfect, or because someone wouldn’t share.

I wonder if Thing 3 has saddled up with another kid and chatted away like he normally does.

I wonder if Thing 2 is being her normal outgoing self.

I wonder if Thing 1 has talked to ANYONE.

And it’s lots of thinking and wondering and praying and calming myself down.

Silly, really.  Because I know that they are all fine.

They don’t have to be scared or nervous.  I’m doing that just fine for all four of them.

Which is kinda what Jesus did for me.  He hung on that cross for me.  And for the hubs.  And the things.  And for you.

Not that I’m condoning my worrisome behavior as the Bible says not to worry.  But I’m going to cling to what I know He did for me.  What He did for those kids.  And trust that everything is just fine — and we’re going to have lots of memories of August 23, 2010.

But man! I can’t wait to hear about their day!  It’s going to be exciting in the House of Chaos tonight!

Until next time…